Experience Life or Save For Retirement

shlomi

Thank you for coming all the way from Israel!

We have had such a whirlwind the past few weeks with tons of family in town, and non stop celebrations.  Some days our kids had to miss a day of camp, and today was the first day of school, and there are many days they are going to miss.  The next celebrations are starting already, my sons birthday is coming up, and we are going to celebrate early, because it runs into the Jewish holidays, and we are also traveling soon to see all of my side of the family. With our travel dates, birthday days off, and a month of holidays, my kids will be experiencing life.

My parents had to work so hard when they left the Soviet Union to make a better life for our family.  I promised myself that even when I work hard, I would have fun.  Yes it is important to provide for your family, yes it is important to have goals and save for the future, but if your primary focus is saving, waiting, and not living, then why are we here.  Balance is the key, and each person has to decide what is right for themselves and their family.

I always tell my clients that investing in your health is preventive maintenance, otherwise you will have to invest in hospital bills and medications.  I suppose for some people saving for retirement is of top priority, for me building and growing are important, but living in the present, being grateful, focusing on my health and inspiring others to put themselves first and enjoy life, is my way experiencing life to the fullest.

To each their own,

All good,

Grateful for Yoga, Mat Pilates, Prenatal Yoga, Labor/Birth Doula Support, and Arasys Inch Loss

Check out my website www.coachyulia.com to learn about the work I love,

Coach Yulia

 

 

To

 

 

 

Stop and Smell the Roses

Notice the dried rose in the back, that was the first rose my husband every gave me, funny it was a valentine's day, me being from Russia and him from Israel, we both don't celebrate it, but he did it all, wine, chocolate, a meaningful card, and one beautiful red rose

Notice the dried rose in the back, that was the first rose my husband every gave me, funny it was a valentine’s day, me being from Russia and him from Israel, we both don’t celebrate it, but he did it all, wine, chocolate, a meaningful card, and one beautiful red rose, that I look at and smile every day

THIS IS THE SECRET TO LIFE!

On our anniversary our new family, my new sister in law’s parents gave me the most beautiful roses, and every time I see them, I cannot help myself, I need to inhale them.  The other day I wrote a blog titled “Procrastination is another word for Faith.”  My mother gives me her insights, and her response to that blog is below, and she titled it Beneficial Insufficiency,

“Hi Docha,

Your blog about procrastination reminded me about what my favorite instructor said about exercise. She taught us while at work we have to be sufficient, we better be insufficient during exercise. It means that some of our motions meant to be slower to make sure that every inch of the muscle and bone is activated and involved. In order to do it right, our analytical mind has to be in control and involved in every millisecond of the routine. Basically, we need to “stop and smell the roses” in every situation.
Love, Mom.”

I am present, I focus on bringing my students and Doula clients present to themselves. All of our senses help get us present, including our intuition, really trusting what feels right, feels good, understanding that the mind and body are in communication, paying 100% attention to ourselves, it is not selfish, it is self care.

Coach Yulia

 

8 Years!

 

sarit with kids

Love My Sister In Law

 

The past few weeks have been magical, family came in town from all over the world.  Today is the Hebrew date of my wedding anniversary, Rosh Chodesh Elul, it has been 8 years! Not only did I marry my other half, but I feel like I also married the most amazing community, and a new family.  My sister in law is the greatest, her oldest boy with the hat and big smile in the picture was one year old at our wedding, and just started walking.  My sister in law introduced me to my doctor and my doula, and now I know that began my journey into beautiful birth experiences, and my path to becoming a doula myself.

We have had so much quality family time and cousin time, it is such a blessing, sometimes the kids hang with me, sometimes they go with their cousins, it is so special to have such a close connection.  What I also love is that I have deepened my own connection to myself and to my spirituality.  It is so amazing to be part of a community that keeps learning, growing, and teaching children and adults to be the light and inspiration to the world around us.  This Hebrew month of Elul is very special because it is right before all of the High Holidays, Rosh Hashana, Yom Kippur, and Sukkot.  Here is a little glimpse of the learning that I love, the deep lessons that can apply to every area of life and every person in every situation,

http://www.israelnationalnews.com/Articles/Article.aspx/17392#.VdCtsyvF_rU.

Every anniversary we treat ourselves to a nice dinner out, tonight we are going to check out a new Kosher Japanese and Chinese fusion restaurant, Owoks, http://yeahthatskosher.com/2015/06/coming-to-la-pariss-owoks-kosher-japanese-chinese-fusion-restaurant/,

I will tell you all about it tomorrow.

Happy Sunday,

Coach Yulia

 

Procrastination is another word for Faith

My gift in this world is that I am fully present, and aware of revealed good in every moment of life.  Things always appear as they should, as I need them, and at the right time.  I am listening to a seminar series of birth professionals, that is aligning exactly with how I function in this world, and validating that I am on the right path.  The Rabbi below suddenly lost his wife at only 37 years old,  she passed away suddenly for no obvious reason, leaving him to raise their 8 children. He keeps inspiring the world, saying that she keeps on giving him winks from above.

Rabbi Hirshy Minkowicz

“Trained by a wink

There are lots of parenting roles which I never believed I was cut out for. Yet when life delivers you the package I received, you learn to step up to the plate and into some roles you would rather avoid.

Not so when it comes to potty training. It is a project which requires effort and patience, and one which I consider to be a stressful and tedious endeavor that I cannot do alone.

So I decided to take the “when he will be ready, he will be ready” approach with my youngest son, and put the venture on a back burner.

That lasted until I woke up one morning and realized that there were only a few weeks until he goes back to school and in order for him to enter the next grade the school requires that he be trained.

I tried talking to him but it was in-one-ear-out-the-other. It wasn’t on his agenda, and I had no desire to put it on mine. So back to the rear burner it went.

Until we arrived last week at our much needed summer vacation and I realized that going back home after the break would also mean back to school, which left me with a very short window of time to teach this kid the early facts of life.

Where to begin and how to get it done, I had no idea. Procrastination tinged with a sense of resignation became the name of the game.

Suddenly out of nowhere my three year old declares. He is done with his diaper and is ready to move on. He is also giving up his bottle and becoming a big boy. It came out of left field as if it had dropped from the sky.

There was never a moment of training or preparing for this step. He was simply ready to move forward and wasn’t looking back.

I thanked G-d for this little miracle and was excited and elated. Yet my curiosity couldn’t rest until I understood where this had come from. I tried to figure out the source of this great gift and where this three year old boy had found this strength and amazing maturity.

Then I remember an episode from two days earlier and I knew who trained this boy. He was playing outside with some children when the mother of one of the boys walked by. Some of the kids shouted to that boy “Oh I see your mother” to which another child replied “And look there I see mine”. Alter was caught in the conversation and needed to respond. He wanted to be like the rest of the children, yet his situation wasn’t the same. Without skipping a beat he looked up to the sky and said “There, I see mine”

Shabbat Shalom”

This touched me deep, children so simply understand this.  My children always ask about their Saba, my husband’s father who passed away a few years ago, they know he is with Hashem, up high in the sky.  One woman commented on Rabbi Hirshy’s post with the title of this blog,

PROCRASTINATION IS ANOTHER WORD FOR FAITH

I have been known to procrastinate, and I love this perspective, I have complete, 100% trust in how the world, God, and everything in our life works.  I know deep down everything always works out as it should, we just have to be patient, trust, have faith, but also actively participate in moving forward.

I love to say in Yoga,

Intense, but not tense.

Try to bring this into your daily life,

Excercise, Yoga, and any other part of your healthy, active lifestyle,

Pregnancy, Labor, Birth, Postpartum, and Parenthood,

Even accepting the joy and honor of knowing someone even after they are gone,

My husband made a potato salad last night for our anniversary and guests that my father in law used to make all the time, he made it for me when I was pregnant and for our kids, he was with us in spirit,

The special people in our lives are always with us,

Feeling Connected,

Coach Yulia

When things go wrong, I am grateful for what turns it around

Yesterday was the craziest day of obstacles, but then right afterwards amazing solutions came about.  I am in awe when we stay out of our own way, control our reactions, and just let things work themselves out, it is really what happens.

  • I went to teach a class at 24 Hour Fitness, and took my older two to the kids club, it was over capacity, and I wasn’t able to teach my class.  One by one my students came to the kids club and told me that they have children, and another one say they have taught children.  It was so sweet of them to offer, but corporate rules would not allow someone not working there to watch over the kids.  Finally one more student offered to just hang with the kids, he took them to Trajer Joes across the street, and said that my class helps him so much, its OK to miss one, so I can teach.
  • We still have family in town, and first thing in the morning we made plans, and througout the day those plans changed probably 10 times, but everything just worked out, we got everything we needed to get done.
  • I ended up with my mother in law and her sister in Chinatown, and remembered that Downtown LA was a great place to get backpacks for school, my mother in law offered to buy my daughter her first backpack as a gift, and we had 10 minutes to park, the store ended up being across the street, ran in, ran out, everybody was happy, done.
  • I drop everybody off, head home with the kids, my car runs out of gas.  I tell my husband to pick the little one up from school, and head our way so we can switch cars, because I had a class to teach in an hour, all worked out.
  • My Yoga mats were in the other car, so I arrived at my class with none, we figured it out, the couple was very happy, done.

I was so happy to finally be home, and just appreciate that everything eventually figures itself out. No reason to stress, worry, over analyze, be anxious, it just gets in the way.

  1. I am tired, still recovering from three babies in the last 2 months, wedding, family, and work
  2. I am in the middle of an amazing birth seminar, I have over 10 videos to watch by this evening
  3. The kids are home, start school next week, driving me bit nutty
  4. We have over 20 guests coming for our Shabbat dinner tonight, that is also our 8 year anniversary.

sam yulia michas wedding

Blessed,

Grateful,

Excited,

Shabbat Shalom

CoachYulia

Positive and Natural

I think those are my favorite two words in the English language, positive and natural, they can apply to everything in life.  I am inspired today by birth professionals who are changing the way women learn, make choices, and have the labor and birth that fits them. Many of these experts talk about intimacy, and how the baby was conceived should be the same love and energy that goes into the labor and birth.

Everywhere else in our lives we are so careful who we let in, what products we use, we really search for the jobs, friends, and lifestyle that feels right for us.  Labor and birth is no different, before we get pregnant we don’t need to know any of this stuff.  Luckily we get almost 10 months to learn everything we can, get our partner on board, think about the birth we want, and who will support that vision, especially during the labor, who will let you stay in your zone and not interfere?

The same themes run through each interview:

  1. Get a doctor/midwife/hospital that is on the same page as you
  2. Learn everything you can, research your labor and birth options as much as you research your registry
  3. Take care of yourself, physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually
  4. Find your team in the labor/birth room, having a woman in the room scientifically makes a big difference
  5. Your partner is also on this new journey and is not an expert, let them be your rock, your advocate, part of the team

One of the experts helps new parents prepare for the huge transition into parenthood.  When a woman is in labor, she needs to know she is supported, trusted, and making informed choices.  Another key factor is trusting herself, her intuition, what positions feel best, what breath makes sense, in the moment each woman finds what works for that specific labor.

If anyone is interested in more information, or would like specific resources, names, and websites, please contact me at coachyulia@gmail.com.

IMG_3076[1]

        Having fun with my brother in law’s

On a mission to support and educate women to love themselves, learn about their choices, and have a positive, natural, and conscious birth experience.

Coach Yulia

Outer Space

IMG_3163[1]

My daughter made this in the art area of the Zimmer Museum, I was just talking about space with my friend that we met there, and after I took this picture I saw the cash underneath – maybe it is telling me that money is on my horizon 🙂

Yesterday outer space was on my radar, it is so amazing how we can see more and more of what we cannot see, my friend’s wife works for the company that is developing the next great telescope,

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Webb_Space_Telescope

He was telling me that she is actually one of the few people who had a chance to see it, and its potential is to see maybe life on other planets or the big bang.  I am in awe, and actually would love to go to the moon one day.  I have sky dived, bungee jumped, been in a hot air balloon, water plane, and helicopter.  I love being high in the sky, and space just seems so brilliant, fascinating, especially the no gravity part.

Then I saw this post today about a meteor shower, https://stardate.org/nightsky/meteors.  It is just so amazing when we take a moment to become aware of the vastness of the world we live in, how everything operates, and how it all is interrelated and needs each other to function.  I was telling my friend, that just like when you see a big sky, or a rainbow, there is never an end, I think even with this telescope, it will just show it is more grand than they thought, and there will be more questions.

Then part of me thinks of how much we need to focus on earth, and making it a better place to live for ourselves, our families, and being of service to our communities and beyond.  I took my daughter to a checkup today at the doctor, we had to wait so long, Thank God we got some good genes, everything looked just right.  I am happy that we only go to the doctor once a year, staying healthy on a daily basis and being conscious is our way of life, and example to the world.

I still want to take a ride to the moon,

My friend said in 40 years it might be $10,000 instead of $250,000,

I will be just over 80 years old,

Sounds fun, gotta start saving now!

Coach Yulia

I Love Cousins!

I just saw this picture, and I am so grateful for cousins, our whole wedding experience has been all about cousins.  We have a big trip coming up where we will see all of my extended family, and I am so excited for all the kid cousins to play, and to see all of my cousins from all over the world.

We had a huge party at our place last night, after a Jewish wedding there are seven celebrations, where special blessings are said for the bride and groom, http://www.jweekly.com/article/full/22501/sheva-brachot-newlyweds-play-king-and-queen-for-a-week/.

I am so blessed that my kids are so open to meeting new family and friends, they are loving, caring, and fun, Thank God. There is so much in my mind, but it is all scrambled together, this is the first day that all the relatives have gone home to all over the United States and all over the world.  I am not on call for a Doula client, so I can get some good sleep, but I am still catching up from two months full of clients and celebrations.

Grateful For Exhaustion From Living And Loving Life,

Coach Yulia

What should I do with my kids in and around LA in the summer?

We can only do our best, as parents we have to take a breath, feel good that we are giving our all, and that is enough

Yes I know, summer is almost over, but I now have my kids home for a few weeks before school starts, and I keep on seeing other moms ask the same question.  I just ran across this website,http://familycampersunite.weebly.com/miscellaneous.html, and it lists many cool and fun activities for families.  I am just going to make a list of all of the other suggestions, that are low cost or free:

  1. Annenberg Beach House
  2. The Aquarium at Santa Monica Pier
  3. Adventure City
  4. Tongva Park Splash Pad
  5. Cabrillo beach museum
  6. The waterbus in Marina Del Rey is $2 a person round trip
  7. El dorado nature center for taking walks.
  8. Grand Park Splash Pad Downtown Los Angeles, you can take the metro straight there, clean and safe
  9. Lake Balboa Park
  10. Zimmer Museum

Just google for more info, many other popular activities and places are in the link above, but the ones above I highly recommend and some of them are new that I will definitely check out before the summer ends.

Have Fun!

Coach Yulia

Parenting

sima and kids

                  Our wonderful cousin came in town for the wedding,                                    the kids are having so much fun with so many family and friends

We have tons of guests in town, and the mother in me is coming out, specifically the Russian, Jewish mother who makes sure everyone has eaten, had a drink, and is taken care of. Yesterday after an amazing party in our synagogue for the new bride and groom, I invited all the cousins over to our house, it was awesome.  It is amazing to me how kids play together, click so easily, and what I love the most they keep my kids busy and having fun, so I get a minute for myself and to chat with adults.

I ran across this article, and it cracked me up, it says that kids are 800% likely to whine when their mother comes in the room, even if they were just fine right before, don’t I know it!  My husband always says they never act that way with him!

http://www.momnewsdaily.com/study-children-are-800-worse-when-their-mothers-are-in-the-room/

Then I saw this amazing post by a friend about how raising children is so powerful, it forms who they are, and also helps the parents grow in the process.  It is a choice of course, for some people it is not easy to get out of the programming of genes and childhood, for others it is just a challenge to go from selfish and single, which is not a bad thing when you are single, to dealing with things in the moment and not walking away, being an example, and not giving up.

“Imagine your children in twenty years. They are adults, and all of the values you worked hard to instill in them during their youth have become integrated into a fully cooked human being. Who are they? What are they like? I invite you to take a moment and write down all of the qualities you hope for them to possess. Really think about it, and make a list.
If you are like most parents, your list may seem lofty, with words like fulfilled, accepting, loving, respectful, self-aware, persistent, open, curious, and brave. But how do we, as parents, help our children to become adults who exhibit even half of these glorious attributes? The great anthropologist, Ashley Montagu, wrote, “The child learns to become the kind of human being he or she has experienced” (Ashley Montagu, personal communication, March 13, 1989). In other words, if we want our children to be respectful, we have to be respectful. If we want our children to be persistent and brave, we have to be persistent and brave. Phew. Quite a lot of pressure, right?
Yes. Parenting is a lot of pressure, and I believe it is important for us to recognize the weight of this awesome responsibility. But if we flip the pressure around, we might find that parenting is also an incredible opportunity for us to look at ourselves, and to consciously choose who we want to be in this world. Did you know we get a choice? For many, there is no better motivation for self-growth than the deep desire to do the best we can for our children. But where do we start?
Oftentimes, the first place might be in becoming aware of where we want to go, and how we would like to evolve and heal. I invite you to ponder this question now. Who do you want to be? What are the values and qualities that you would like to work on? Once you have a palpable sense of this, refer back to your list of qualities you envision for your future adult child. If you are like most parents, you will find that the lists are similar, with your hopes for your child being congruent to your hopes for yourself. You already may have been working towards all, or pieces of these lists without recognizing the similarities. Now you have a family goal.
Next, think about ways to incorporate the values important to your family into your daily life. For example, while doing this exercise, one mother realized that communication was something that landed on both of her lists. We came up with ways that her family could practice communication on a daily basis. In her family, each member of the family shares one fun thing, one hard thing, and one proud thing from their days at the dinner table. This helps the family connect and communicate with each other. Just like in the example above, when we are clear about where we are headed, the road along the way often becomes self-evident.
As we and our children embark on our journey together, we get to decide what kind of experiences they will embody, and which qualities we are going to model for them. And in turn, because we love our children so absolutely, we get to grow too.

*Dahlia Greenbaum is a Marriage and Family Therapy Trainee. The information above is for educational purposes, and is not a substitute for therapy. If you are in need of therapeutic help, please seek professional clinical counseling.”

It’s not easy,

I wouldn’t change it for the world,

Ready for them to be adults, have some tea and a good conversation,

Parents tell me they will always be your babies in the good ways and the challenging ways,

OY!

Coach Yulia