I am in awe of life, of movement, of things we cannot control. In three hours I will have breakfast, write my blog, teach a Pilates class, and then go back to a laboring mama that I have been with all night.
The unknown is so fascinating to me, and all we can do is trust deep within ourselves which is the right path to take. We can get advice, direction, and guidance, but ultimately it is only our own choice that we can make in any situation.
Labor is something that has no formula, there is no right way, and even with the same woman, it is different with each pregnancy. I have been on call for a week, and things started brewing, I wasn’t needed right away, but I could not sleep, I felt like it was coming sooner rather than later. Last night, it was 8pm, and a friend had a birthday celebration with some amazing women that were sharing thoughts on Torah and Judaism. This was the perfect place to hold my energy, get inspired, and connect to when was the right time to support.
The main message of the evening was to trust completely, we all have our unique purpose, and to get uncomfortable, throw yourself into what feels right, go for it, do it, and the light will shine along with you.
Then I got home around 11pm, was wondering whether to rest on the couch or to head to the hospital to be ready, and I got a sign loud and clear. A fellow Doula called out of the blue at 11:30pm to ask me to be her backup doula later that month. This was a perfect distraction to keep me awake, and get in my car and drive, not to disturb my family that was already asleep. So random that she messaged me so late, we have not talked in a long time, and we had the most amazing conversation about our Doula experiences, we were in the same Doula training a few years ago. I stopped for coffee and a banana for later, and got a text to come to the hospital. Everything happens as it should, I have a break, on a natural high, doing what I am meant to do in this world.